Family peace and worry

You know that old saying, “No use crying over spilled milk”? Well there is no use crying over a shattered glass baby bottle of formula either, even with a hungry baby in tow.

Bad things happen, and I am not talking about death or illness type bad things, I am talking seemingly small and minor things, like spilled milk. On our way into church last week we opened up the back of the SUV and the diaper bag fell onto the parking lot with one of our glass baby bottles with formula in it’s side pocket. I saw it falling out in somewhat of a slow motion effect in my mind, and me wanting to jump and grab our favorite glass bottle, but I couldn’t get to it. No one could. It shattered all over, like one of our kids threw a water balloon filled with milk at our feet. Our soon to be hungry, 9 month old foster daughter in the car along with some of our boys heard a few un-church like words coming out of my husbands mouth and then me scolding him that we are “AT CHURCH! CALM DOWN!”, which doesn’t help him or I calm down. To be honest, getting to church, or anywhere on time, is tough with all our kids. In that moment, I can choose to pick up the pieces and not let it ruin your morning or day, or I can dwell on it and let it consume my thoughts and generally it steam rolls into other “spilled milk” moments.

Did you know there is actually a National “Don’t cry over spilled milk day”? It is February 11th and I guess on this day we are supposed to remember, to forget our mistakes or things we cannot undo. Dwelling on the negative, will actually keep you in a negative mind state. If you keep replaying it in your mind on what should have been done, that is unproductive and will only add to the frustration and potentially trigger more “spilled milk”. There are some little guard rails I use to not dwell on things I cannot change

MORNING GRATITUDE: With every step to the bathroom start with gratitude. Anything and everything you can think of with every step. Say it out loud or in your mind. Give thanks to God for things He has given or if you can’t think of anything in the moment here are some examples I use: “Thank you for my sleep, thank you for my easy breathing, thank you for no pain, thank you for warm water, thank you for toilet paper, thank you for running water, thank you for sweet smelling soap.” You get the picture. It could also be much deeper but whatever step you take in those morning wake up moments… be grateful.

PRAY OR READ SCRIPTURE: I have tried many times to get up earlier than the kids and read my bible and have not been able to establish a consistent routine with that in the morning. If you are a morning person, then yay for you, but I am not. I have tried and failed more times than I can remember. However, this is a GREAT place to start if you are starting something new. Get up and after a trip to the bathroom, grab some coffee or water and read your bible for whatever your set time is. Routine is key. For me, not being a morning person, I set my phone to have a daily alert at noon and that is when I pray. I keep a list of prayer requests in my phone and I run through that list and anything else that I can think of going on in the world or close to me.

RESOLVE and DON’T DWELL: If you can resolve the issue quickly like we were able to, do it! Pick up the pieces and move on with your day, if a few choice words come out, give yourself grace, if you need to say “sorry” do it and try hard not to let it ruin your day or others day. If your spilled milk is bigger, and out of your control, that is a whole different post!

1. Start your day with gratitude.
2. Read or listen to your bible or a scripture.
3. Resolve any minor issues that come up quickly.

We picked up the pieces of our broken bottle. Took a breather and then we walked into church. My husband drove home to get another bottle of formula. We were immersed in the word of our community group and then service, and I thought how grateful I was that a friend donated those glass bottles to us, they really are a treasure and I have a few more of them, I will be more careful. Since then, we have used our plastic bottles to bring with us to church.